Romans & Cinderella & Zombies

"Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things, but those who are controlled by the Holy Spirit think about things that please the Spirit. So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace..."

Letting the sinful nature control your mind leads to death but letting the Holy Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace! And not the kind that you get when we are put in the ground and no longer walk the earth--this is to be alive in Christ now, before you see Him face to face in Heaven. 

I look back at my life and can remember moments of this kind of living (and thank God He is patient with me and faithful to complete the work He began in me) because I was the walking dead. I lived in fear, so much fear and insecurity. I was called a "timid David" by a praying mama when I was a teenager--I didn't realize it was a bad thing to be timid, but you shrink back from ever truly living and being who you were born to be. Fear is part of our sin nature; it doesn't come from God and it paralyzes you and steals your peace.

"For the sinful nature is always hostile to God. It never did obey God’s laws, and it never will. That’s why those who are still under the control of their sinful nature can never please God. But you are not controlled by your sinful nature. You are controlled by the Spirit if you have the Spirit of God living in you. (And remember that those who do not have the Spirit of Christ living in them do not belong to him at all.)..."

About a month or so ago God was like, "Your flesh is not your friend. It hates me. Kill it." That sounds harsh. You have to understand what it is though in order to understand why the harsh treatment, especially if you want to be friends with God. 

What is our flesh? It's our natural inclinations, those thoughts and actions, responses, even reactions we think and move and live in first. We are born into a sin-filled world so we sin; it is all we know until we come to Christ. Our natural self does what it wants to please itself because selfishness is at its core. It is hostile to God and all that He represents. We cannot please God and live "in the flesh" or live how we are naturally used to living, which is self-centered. It goes against all that God does. He, Who went so far to save us by dying in our place, did the ultimate selfless act of giving His life for our own.

Our sin nature is very subtle. It can take the form of weeds that pop up in the flower beds of our personality, cultural heritage, birth order and upbringing. It can also dominate our predispositions and can be seen at work in our attitudes, addictions, bad habits and compulsions. We've really always known it's been there because we get angry at ourselves for why we do the things we do sometimes.  

The selfish part of us is also deadly. You cannot truly live if it is constantly rising to the surface in you, plaguing you and the relationships you seek to nourish. That's why God asked for such a harsh treatment of this natural-tendencied unseen, but very real, force in my life. He would ask you to do the same.

The selfish nature we are born with is not the Cinderella we are all cheering for to win the prince at the end of the fairy tale, it's the wicked toothless stepsister constantly pushing her way around the house making messes for Cinderella to clean up. 

"And Christ lives within you, so even though your body will die because of sin, the Spirit gives you life because you have been made right with God. The Spirit of God, who raised Jesus from the dead, lives in you. And just as God raised Christ Jesus from the dead, he will give life to your mortal bodies by this same Spirit living within you. Therefore, dear brothers and sisters, you have no obligation to do what your sinful nature urges you to do. For if you live by its dictates, you will die. But if through the power of the Spirit you put to death the deeds of your sinful nature, you will live. For all who are led by the Spirit of God are children of God..."

Can you get that in your spirit for a minute?? The SAME Spirit that raised Christ from the dead can live in you!! And if you are in Christ you have no obligation to listen to what your old nature tells you to do; you are no longer a slave to it because through the power of the Holy Spirit you kill it off--daily. Think of it as a zombie you are constantly having to hack down by submitting to God and walking in His Spirit. The sin nature will literally be the walking dead in your life if you allow it to dominate again.

"So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, “Abba, Father.” (Romans 8:5-15 NLT)

You are no longer a slave. You have Palace dwellings and access to the King of Kings. You can live with the Prince of Peace at work in your life now. We can call on the name of our God to help us walk daily in the power and authority of His Holy Spirit and so keep putting to death the desires of the flesh. 

Fruit

I don't know about you, but I've never enjoyed self-help kinda books. In my opinion I don't know if they really work. On their own they've always felt like another to-do list of behaviors to try to be a better you. So we strive and strive. And if we're honest we can still say we don't measure up.

Do you think we have complicated this enough for ourselves? Read all these books on how to be more patient, how to be more loving, how to have more joy. Just do this better, just do this less. Striving but never fully attaining anything. It's defeating. 

This is especially frustrating as a mom. Millions, if not thousands of books, have been written on how to be a better parent or have better kids. It can be frustrating to realize you are doing it wrong and you don't make the grade. It's proven even deeper to you as you try all the trends and philosophies--and fail, yet again.  

I sought God out for this. I know I don't have all the answers and simply trying to "try harder" is exhausting, defeating, and leaves you more broken over all your failures and shortcomings than when you started. 

We can do this with God. We try harder to meet that list of what we think we should be and do, trying to force the fruit of the Spirit in our lives because that's the self-help of Christianity. "You just need more joy in your life." "You need to be more patient." "Have a little self-control!" and read this or that book to get it. We are frustrated with the question most of us can't bear to mumble but the one our very souls scream: "HOW?!"

We are working at this backwards. God was showing me it's like a tree. We try to take the fruit of His Spirit--the love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control--the ones we think we need more of in our lives and place them on the branches of our heart. We hope it sticks this time. 

That fruit can stay for a little bit, sure. But enough wind or rain and it will fall off! Enough sun to scorch the fruit and it will rot! And here we are back where we started, fruitless and frustrated. 

All that fruit doesn't come from simply striving to be better. You can't even pray to have more patience because it doesn't work that way. It comes from having your roots go down deep into all that He is and it blossoms and seeds AS A RESULT of His Holy Spirit at work in your heart and mind. It flourishes as you live in the Spirit and not in your own power. A self-help book is only going to get you so far for so long. Our minds understand the measures it needs to take to be better, we can fathom the A, B, C, and D--but only the Holy Spirit can birth life-giving fruit that lasts. It comes from truly knowing Him and being filled with all that He is!

Fruit is a by-product of being in Him. You can try all you want on your own without His Spirit and it won't matter one bit. It's self-righteousness, and it's worthless. Recite all the scripture you want, wear a tee-shirt with some verse about love, put it on a coffee mug--it won't matter. If you are dead in your sin and living in the flesh you cannot produce the fruit of the Spirit. It is born of Him and through Him and anything else is useless.

Allow God to have His way in your life. Allow Him to fill you with His Holy Spirit. He wants you to have all those good things in your life even more than you do. 

Trust & Eve & You

After God started showing up in my closet and in my kitchen (if that doesn't make any sense to you, you are late in the conversation; read the blogpost before this and catch up) and in my car and on the phone with friends, I began to hear nagging doubts in the caves of my mind. "God is this really You?" "Am I crazy?" "How do I know this is You and not me?"

As soon as I would let my mind swirl with these questions, a paralyzing fear began to creep at the door of my heart. I knew these were not from the same God I had come to meet-up with daily. I knew I wasn't the same unsure me I was months ago, weeks ago, days--even hours ago. I looked at the fruit of God in my life--love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control all none of which I could produce on my own--and how my home and those around me seemed to be changed by the very presence of God in my life. And these questions didn't stem from a heart on fire, but from someplace else.

The subtle way Eve was conned into giving up all Eden and closeness with God, completely unashamed in who He made her to be, was to attack her trust in Him.

Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?”  The woman said to the serpent, “We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’” “You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman. “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. (Genesis 3:1-6, emphasis added)

The doubt thoughts that would grip me came subtle and I would be stuck on doubts instead of looking to Jesus--to see Him above the waves like Peter on the water in Matthew 14:22-32. So with the new authority that had arisen in me I tossed them out of my mind and allowed God to fill those coves of uncertainty with Himself instead.

Our mistrust in God and all that He has said in His Word puts us in a position to allow mistrust of God to permeate not only our lives but the lives of others around us too. To go back and forth on a rollercoaster of trust and doubt is not the thrill seeking ride you enjoy at a fair. It is immobilizing.

I was reading my She Reads Truth devotional on Emmanuel--which happened to be on trust today!--and it was on Zechariah, and how he was muted by the angel Gabriel because he didn't believe what the angel had told him (that his wife Elizabeth would have a son in her old age and all the wonderful things this son would do and become). The devotional went on to discuss why such the harsh consequence for Zechariah, a priest of the Lord: "with great power comes great responsibility" and "Like any relationship, distrust whittles away a bond over time."

Our enemy seeks to render us useless in God's hands because of our unbelief. And it's no wonder! Can you imagine a people completely abandoned in the hands of the One Who made them, unshaken and secure in their unrelenting trust in Him? That must be an incredible sight! Orphans wouldn't go without a loving home, broken relationships could be mended, victims could be rescued and the voiceless would have a voice.

You see while you are stuck on the rollercoaster going up and down and round and round God and the rest of the world is waiting for you to stop and move on, to step out and trust--because you are needed. Yes, you! And you may even have a hard time believing that but get off the ride already! We're all waiting! You see, if your enemy can get you to mistrust the God Who made you--you are already defeated. There wasn't even a battle to fight, because who wants to fight for a King who can't be trusted? Nobody does. They stay home and watch Netflix all night because they believe that's as good as it gets. (Please don't misread me, I like Netflix, really. But if anything like that is your end-all to end-all you just need to wake up.)

God can be trusted. And He's choosing you to trust His Kingdom with. But He's looking for a people who, with abandon, will lavish all their trust on Him. We can't afford not to trust Him at His word. Our very salvation depends on putting our faith in Him. He alone is truly trustworthy! Will you put your faith in Him today? He is able to do all that He says. We can trust our God, our Maker. He is a good Father.

Shift: The Beginning of This New Journey

I began to feel God draw me about 2 months ago. I could see the results during Christmastime. Something in me began to shift.

Very simply and in desperation for something more of God I began to get on my face. Sometimes it would be for 5 minutes or maybe even 2 minutes depending on if my kids interrupted me sooner. Stealing away to a quiet corner of the house for a moment to bow before my God and surrender the day to Him. This spiritual alignment felt as if God had become the chiropractor of my soul.

I could sense my spirit waking up. It had been lulled to sleep by the poison of distraction and insecurities for so long but I realized I was strong as I stood up. 

Little pieces of my day began to align along with my heart and mind. The mundane and frustrating began to have new meaning; so many divine opportunities lay before me. Some things began to have less meaning, like the all-night Netflix binges that had become a habit. I had a bit of an appetite now for these 'face-times' as I called them because I began to see a change in me as I met with God in these moments.

The atmosphere of my home began to change. I realized that I could set the spiritual mood in my house--that old saying "If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy" rings true! My kids, though still crazy energetic and defiant some days, actually do seem happier and more responsive to a mom at peace.

I had a new little campfire of God in my soul and I wanted to see God do even more. I began to join the Monday night prayer conference calls with some mom friends. Seeing God answer prayers left and right after you've prayed makes you bold; you want to ask your big God for big stuff and run to Him with any little thing too, because why not?

Our church started a fast beginning with Lent and the challenge was to give up anything for Lent that was distracting you from meeting with God. Well, I knew Netflix was a given but then I sensed that God wanted me to give up sleep.

Why sleep? I'm a mom and I need it. Did I hear right? Aside from all the cool stuff God was doing in my life I still woke up like a bear when my kids would get up early. I dreaded that creak of the bedroom door at 6:00 am. And I did not like the responses I erupted on my kids when they would interrupt my precious sleep.

So I gave it a whirl. Without Netflix to keep me up all night getting up earlier wouldn't be as assaulting to my countenance. Six o'clock in the morning I would get up and go into my walk-in closet and pray. (I literally have a prayer closet now.) Sometimes God would get me up earlier, but always knowing I am being drawn by Him to come. (And I'm excited to come.) The closet was a secret meeting place, nobody knew but me and God.

Then the day came where I could no longer keep all this covert. Before the day began I was in my prayer closet meeting with God and I could feel the fire stirring in my heart and as I breathed out it was like a breath of Heaven. I could almost see it in my mind; full of fire. Then in my kitchen doing dishes--of all places--fire fell from Heaven and consumed my heart. I felt as if I was trying to contain an explosion in my soul, and I couldn't keep this quiet any longer. I didn't even realize what was happening so I started texting some of my mom friends trying to describe what was now all ablaze inside of me. The campfire I had was as if God had come and poured gas all over it. And it was spreading. 

Later I read in Luke 3:10, "He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire." With fire. I have the Holy Spirit, I was missing the other part.

The past couple weeks have been intense but totally Spirit led living with this new fire to seal what's being restored inside my life. My home is now a place of peace despite what toddler and preschool chaos can create. We are still on Holy ground.

For a bit I thought I might be going crazy. God whispered "Can you be a little crazy for Me?" I feared becoming "that chick." But I'm His chick, with more authority and fruit of His spirit than I have ever seen in my entire life. This is who I was made to be; fully alive in Him. 

I could write a short novel about the past couple weeks of how I've seen God work in and through me in various ways but I will save that for a different blog post or for you over coffee--because you want to know! But I wanted to show you what it can mean to seek and find the God of the universe. He meets you in closets and kitchens and dwells in human hearts. And He sings to us "Come, and know Who I am. Be filled up and poured out again. Come."~*